2 Commentsi hate when people wait for their loved ones to die and then they start preaching about how short life is, and how you should tell those around you how you feel about them. why not start before that happens? it's easy... "fefa, i love you, and i want your car."

here's my way of recognizing the women in my life who are so important to me, and why. i could just say they're all really hot, 'cause they totally are, but it's deeper than that. their closets play a role too.

and in alphabetical order.... i don't need any catfights around here...


allyce
aka: AJ, obese allyce, pleasantly plump allyce

quiet, laid-back, and easy to please. which is nice, since i like to take control and be around people who laugh at all my jokes. recently having joined the ranks of figure models, i feel even more guilty eating donuts around her. before i only felt a little guilty.
always with a smile on her face, which is amazing considering she used to work with kids with cancer. but don't let that smile fool you. she's had life experience and doesn't see the world through rose-colored glasses. just orange ones.
if she were to die, i would cut her face off (a la hannibal lecter) and wear it, but not in a creepy way. only because she has great skin.
i am lucky to call her one of my bestest friends, because she doesn't just let anyone get close to her... only girls that know what 'roughie' and 'yippee' mean.



amber
aka: amberlicious, disney freak, spartan lover

if bryan ever decides that he's more into brunettes than blondes, i am in trouble. not that he could, since her 12-foot tall boyfriend probably wouldn't be down with that and would sit on peters and break his weak legs.
her wit and snide comments are my favorite characteristics... even in weird, uncomfortable or depressing situations, she's got something sharp to say, and God help you if you're on the receiving end.
we have a mutual interest in oil & gas, disney and future plastic surgeries.
and like allyce, i would wear a part of her after she died... but i can't say it here. yes, even lfc has to drawn the line on decency somewhere.



ashley
aka: smashley, a piece of ash

probably the gal i am closest to, if we were talking in terms of phone minutes and emails. we certainly communicate the most, since what we both do best is talk about ourselves and other people. but she really does know more about me than most people do. which always frightens me... she has too much power.
i strive to be more like ashley... self-aware, evolving, and skinny. if only crone's was contagious, i'd make out with her all the time. too much teeth!
one of a kind this one. and those that have crossed her path would agree. a 'tall drink of water', she's sweet, funny and likes fart and poop jokes (a girl after my own heart). and she can laugh at herself... a rare trait in someone so cute.
just don't ask her why her belly button is so weird looking.



brande
aka: mrs. nester, pees-a-lot

i never wanted new friends, 'cause the ones i have rock, and most girls i meet are catty, snobby, or don't believe in plastic surgery. but brande was a breath of fresh air, and i couldn't resist adding her to my bff list.
goofy and sweet are really the best ways to describe her. and even though i'm an open book, her bluntness about herself frightens me sometimes. boogers and butt sex? she's said it ALL. but it's really what adds to her endearing nature.
she's the girl you always want to pinch her cheeks - and in between taking shots of crown and looking hot even without makeup, you can't help but love her.
but next time brande, don't lift your skirt.



erin
aka: baby e, mama e, gilley

a tiny package, with a ton of energy, sweetness and fun. we know what we both love doing, so every time we meet up, we try to do it all in one sitting: drink, gossip and drink more. she also shares my interest in politics, so it's nice to have stimulating conversation such as current affairs with a close girlfriend. until she's had her 12th chocolate martini - feisty is the word.
our opinions are all too similar, so what's better than talking to someone that validates all your thoughts? the answer is nothing.
and anyone that can lose baby weight so quickly rocks.






felicia
aka: fefa, beej's baby mama, feeefaaaa

fe really needs no introduction around here. she's an lfc regular, and most people who have read her stuff left me to go to her. thanks fe.
i'm not quite sure how one would describe fe... except fuckin' funny. yeah, i said it, FUNNY.
her comedic timing and originality cannot be topped. i am always amazed at how her responses, comments, texts and emails leave me with nothing else to say. how can someone top "spicshaw"? most of the time i don't even bother responding, because really, i would just look like an idiot, and frankly, we don't need that.
we go back a long way, dating back to crazy ex's and dressing goth. i'll let you figure out which was which. but luckily we saw through that to our inner selves, and became bff's. or maybe we both liked making fun of people, and that was enough to keep the friendship going.



nece
aka: necey, danika

her most stunning trait - her outward beauty. all eyes turn to her when she walks in a room. which is probably why it took us so long to become good friends... i'm not one to be intimidated by a beautiful girl, but there's always a first time.
get past the looks and you've got an intelligent, sweet and humble gal. she's your typical texas girl mix of brains and beauty - with a degree in knobby knees.
our friendship was based on our double dates - but it developed into a mutual love and respect and a LOT of shared secrets. she knows she'll get the truth from me, and i know i'll get a locked vault from her. and we're not allowed to drink together... it's like two becoming one.
and i can always count on her telling me if the guys in the band are hot. let's face it, sometimes i need someone to tell me the truth and show me the singer UP CLOSE.


so that's it! my favoritist girls in the world. right behind posh and paris. because if either one of those two decide i am worthy of being their friend, you ladies are OUT. please don't take offense. it's not me, it's you.